What is relaxation?
In common terminology, relaxation means that we leave ourselves free of tension. Relaxing mind may mean that the mind is not under stress or active. In today's lifestyle, this looks difficult. Isn't it?
Now a days, most of us believe to be being under stress during most of the week and relax only on the weekends. This is considered the common way of life. Is this the right way of living? Is living a relaxed life all the time not our right? Let us reclaim it.
Bad stress -
If you ask anyone that why is he/she under stress most of the week, what answer do you expect to get? I have so much work to do, deadlines to meet, tasks to be completed, prepare for the new launch etc. Don't you think that something like this will be the response?
Let us discuss why most of us are stressed all the time.
At some time in our life, while we are chasing the dreams we lose our habit of sitting back and reflecting. We begin giving auto responses. If we are held up in a traffic jam, our response is - either to worry about the work ahead, or blame the system or some such negative thought. Not many of us think - All right. If the traffic is not moving, let me relax, listen to some good music, or go back to some childhood memories, remember good friends, let me make the best use of the time to relax and enjoy life. Not many of us respond in this way. We respond in stressed way whenever we come across any similar situation. This habit is taking a big toll on our quality of life.
Stress - A way of life.
We have taken stress as a way of life. Very few of us think about why they are trying to work at such a hectic pace and if ultimately, we are going to leave this world with a lot of incomplete work, why not at least work in a relaxed way? What is the use of working so much , if we kill all the joy. In search of a better tomorrow, we kill the present. Isn't it?
Stressed work environment, stressed family life, no time to just walk around doing nothing but watch the nature...Why? It is as if we want to achieve most in the shortest possible time and therefore have no time to relax Working non-stop all the week is a way of life for a large majority. The increase in cardiac attacks, depression etc, are all the results of this stressed lifestyle. When we get stressed, we look around for the latest stress busters, latest therapies, etc. to counter the stress.
And then by the time the week ends, we again go out somewhere to relax. Sometimes holidays also tire, don't they?
Why not lead a relaxed life all through the week?
Why not work in a relaxed frame of mind? Why get stressed?
Reflection about our own life is very essential if we want to reclaim our right to live peacefully. Will it help, if we bring some beautiful scenes of nature on our computers? Will it help, if we find time to watch a butterfly flying on our screens? The beauty of a colorful flower. Can it make us little relaxed?
If your answer is yes, download screensavers and find time to watch them whenever you find time while working. Look at them, wonder about the beauty of nature, think of their perfection and just relax.
Showing posts with label stress. Show all posts
Showing posts with label stress. Show all posts
Thursday, April 8, 2010
Saturday, March 27, 2010
Top Stress Reducers Are Dogs
Stress-related illnesses are at an all time high in America, and there is no sign it will lessen. For the most part, doctors have identified the basic cause of this to be our “seriousness”. By that they mean taking ourselves too seriously, thus causing so much pressure that any meaningful stress management is impossible. When things are beyond our power to solve, we must drop the ball; not easy for non-quitters.
Unhealthy levels of stress show as mood changes, migraines, hair loss, worry, agitation, sleeplessness, weight gain and the more serious level; depression. Stress contributes to half of all illnesses in the U.S. and 70% of all visits to the doctor’s office. But before you see your doctor to ask if Valium is right for you – let’s consider some natural options.
Laughter is an antidote to stress. When we laugh, blood flow to the brain is increased and endorphins (that hormone that gives us a sense of well-being) are released and levels of stress drop dramatically. We can begin this healing by laughing at our own selves, our perfect imperfection that makes up all of us.
Force yourself to be more sociable because under stress our instincts tell us to withdraw and isolate ourselves. Nothing could be worse according to stress experts. Isolation allows us to concentrate on our problems, which perpetuates negative thinking – instead of resolving it, we intensify it. When you feel stressed to the max, call a friend or put yourself among children; they have a way of making anyone forget their worries. Volunteer work is a good stress-buster.
Indecisiveness can intensify stress, so we must learn to be more assertive. Some may associate assertiveness with hostility or aggression, but we simply mean expressing your feelings, letting others know your opinions and acting on your own behalf. Some things we can practice are: speaking up when you feel it’s warranted… initiate conversations… make an effort to seek out and form new friendships. Don’t be afraid to disagree. Give out and accept – compliments. Ask for information.
When trying to break the sleeplessness cycle, avoid alcohol, caffeine and tobacco – all of which have negative effects on sleep. Do something calming before bed; a warm bath, soft music, scented candles. Talk positively to yourself and pat yourself on the back now and then for a job well-done. Then give yourself a reward because when you do that you will realize a boost in your immune system that can last for several days. This can be a pair of shoes or as simple as a dish of ice cream (or both)!
Slowing down nearly everything in your life is another stress reliever. Holistic studies have taught me to stop running for the phone when it rings – why did I always do that? I now concentrate on driving slower, pausing after I park the car in the garage just to relax as I ease into another transition. I don’t hurry my meals, but chew more slowly and with all of this you can feel the stress ebb away.
Also, write down those nagging problems. Make two columns on the paper: one “Worries I can do something about” and the other “Worries I can’t do anything about”. Reading these from your notes offers another dimension and you can begin to accept the ones you can’t change, and go about finding solutions for those you can.
One doctor’s research of 480 people under stressful conditions found that, “… the top stress reducers are dogs”. People who were facing unbearable situations had the lowest heart rates and blood pressure if they were with their dogs – even lower than those who were with the spouses. Possible reason: Dogs are perceived as completely nonjudgmental.
Unhealthy levels of stress show as mood changes, migraines, hair loss, worry, agitation, sleeplessness, weight gain and the more serious level; depression. Stress contributes to half of all illnesses in the U.S. and 70% of all visits to the doctor’s office. But before you see your doctor to ask if Valium is right for you – let’s consider some natural options.
Laughter is an antidote to stress. When we laugh, blood flow to the brain is increased and endorphins (that hormone that gives us a sense of well-being) are released and levels of stress drop dramatically. We can begin this healing by laughing at our own selves, our perfect imperfection that makes up all of us.
Force yourself to be more sociable because under stress our instincts tell us to withdraw and isolate ourselves. Nothing could be worse according to stress experts. Isolation allows us to concentrate on our problems, which perpetuates negative thinking – instead of resolving it, we intensify it. When you feel stressed to the max, call a friend or put yourself among children; they have a way of making anyone forget their worries. Volunteer work is a good stress-buster.
Indecisiveness can intensify stress, so we must learn to be more assertive. Some may associate assertiveness with hostility or aggression, but we simply mean expressing your feelings, letting others know your opinions and acting on your own behalf. Some things we can practice are: speaking up when you feel it’s warranted… initiate conversations… make an effort to seek out and form new friendships. Don’t be afraid to disagree. Give out and accept – compliments. Ask for information.
When trying to break the sleeplessness cycle, avoid alcohol, caffeine and tobacco – all of which have negative effects on sleep. Do something calming before bed; a warm bath, soft music, scented candles. Talk positively to yourself and pat yourself on the back now and then for a job well-done. Then give yourself a reward because when you do that you will realize a boost in your immune system that can last for several days. This can be a pair of shoes or as simple as a dish of ice cream (or both)!
Slowing down nearly everything in your life is another stress reliever. Holistic studies have taught me to stop running for the phone when it rings – why did I always do that? I now concentrate on driving slower, pausing after I park the car in the garage just to relax as I ease into another transition. I don’t hurry my meals, but chew more slowly and with all of this you can feel the stress ebb away.
Also, write down those nagging problems. Make two columns on the paper: one “Worries I can do something about” and the other “Worries I can’t do anything about”. Reading these from your notes offers another dimension and you can begin to accept the ones you can’t change, and go about finding solutions for those you can.
One doctor’s research of 480 people under stressful conditions found that, “… the top stress reducers are dogs”. People who were facing unbearable situations had the lowest heart rates and blood pressure if they were with their dogs – even lower than those who were with the spouses. Possible reason: Dogs are perceived as completely nonjudgmental.
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
5 Tips for Surviving an Unfair Boss
Every job has stress, but the workplace environment can seem almost unbearable when working for an over-demanding or unfair boss. You don’t have to like your boss, but you do need to be able to co-exist and co-operate with him for you to be productive and successful at your job.
Other than a change taking place, as I discussed in the article ‘Unhappy at Work? A Change is Coming,’ there is no perfect solution for dealing with a difficult boss, but here are five suggestions that might make your situation a little less painful.
#1) Think of your boss as a parent and you as his teenage child.
This sounds silly at first, but the relationship between you and your boss is very similar to that between a parent and child. Teenagers often have problems with authority and experience disagreements with their parents. Meanwhile, parents often create rules the child believes to be unfair. If the situation gets bad enough, as soon as the child is old enough he finds a way to move out and make it on his own. Parents aren’t perfect and neither are bosses - both will make mistakes.
#2) Do the absolute best job you can.
Sometimes the child misbehaves.
J. Paul Getty once said, “The employer generally gets the employees he deserves.”
Make sure you are the type of employee you would want working for you if you were the boss. I know this goes against the notion of revenge and tucking it to an unfair boss whenever possible, but by doing the best job possible you give the unfair boss less ammunition he can use to make your life miserable. He also might think twice about upsetting one of his better employees when there are plenty of other, easier targets he can take aim at.
Don’t draw attention to yourself. Unless you are the only one your boss has it in for, there should be plenty of others to draw his wrath away from you. Let someone else wear the target on their back.
#3) Learn all that you can from an unfair boss.
We can learn something from everyone we come into contact with. While from a good boss we can learn good management techniques, it is also true that from a poor boss we can learn how not to act. Don’t just suffer, gain something from the situation that will benefit you in the future. Watch how your boss handles different situations and make a mental note of which techniques worked and which failed.
#4) Forget about yesterday.
Yesterday is history, it’s over with. Try not to let your issues from yesterday spoil today. Instead, start each day with a new, positive outlook, telling yourself that today is going to be better.
Sometimes we get into a rut, expect the worse and act accordingly - we subconsciously force a person (in this case, our boss) to act the way we expect him to act. Make sure you are not unintentionally adding fuel to the fire. Starting each day with a fresh slate is the best way to get past previous differences. Holding onto a grudge only hurts yourself.
#5) Take responsibility.
Don’t expect someone else to end your suffering.
Complaining is easy, but it accomplishes very little. Worrying about a problem won’t make it go away while losing sleep and dwelling on an issue only makes it seem worse. You will never be happy if you are focusing on worry. If you are truly in a situation that is causing you pain, you need to begin taking steps to improve the situation.
The Roman Philosopher Sallust said, “Every man is the architect of his own fortune.”
Have you actually looked for another job? Have you tried to improve your skills through in-house training, adult learning centers, books or correspondence courses? Even the smallest step in the right direction is progress. An obstinate boss won’t change his ways, but you can improve your own skills. Why not let your difficult boss be the motivation you use to better yourself?
Other than a change taking place, as I discussed in the article ‘Unhappy at Work? A Change is Coming,’ there is no perfect solution for dealing with a difficult boss, but here are five suggestions that might make your situation a little less painful.
#1) Think of your boss as a parent and you as his teenage child.
This sounds silly at first, but the relationship between you and your boss is very similar to that between a parent and child. Teenagers often have problems with authority and experience disagreements with their parents. Meanwhile, parents often create rules the child believes to be unfair. If the situation gets bad enough, as soon as the child is old enough he finds a way to move out and make it on his own. Parents aren’t perfect and neither are bosses - both will make mistakes.
#2) Do the absolute best job you can.
Sometimes the child misbehaves.
J. Paul Getty once said, “The employer generally gets the employees he deserves.”
Make sure you are the type of employee you would want working for you if you were the boss. I know this goes against the notion of revenge and tucking it to an unfair boss whenever possible, but by doing the best job possible you give the unfair boss less ammunition he can use to make your life miserable. He also might think twice about upsetting one of his better employees when there are plenty of other, easier targets he can take aim at.
Don’t draw attention to yourself. Unless you are the only one your boss has it in for, there should be plenty of others to draw his wrath away from you. Let someone else wear the target on their back.
#3) Learn all that you can from an unfair boss.
We can learn something from everyone we come into contact with. While from a good boss we can learn good management techniques, it is also true that from a poor boss we can learn how not to act. Don’t just suffer, gain something from the situation that will benefit you in the future. Watch how your boss handles different situations and make a mental note of which techniques worked and which failed.
#4) Forget about yesterday.
Yesterday is history, it’s over with. Try not to let your issues from yesterday spoil today. Instead, start each day with a new, positive outlook, telling yourself that today is going to be better.
Sometimes we get into a rut, expect the worse and act accordingly - we subconsciously force a person (in this case, our boss) to act the way we expect him to act. Make sure you are not unintentionally adding fuel to the fire. Starting each day with a fresh slate is the best way to get past previous differences. Holding onto a grudge only hurts yourself.
#5) Take responsibility.
Don’t expect someone else to end your suffering.
Complaining is easy, but it accomplishes very little. Worrying about a problem won’t make it go away while losing sleep and dwelling on an issue only makes it seem worse. You will never be happy if you are focusing on worry. If you are truly in a situation that is causing you pain, you need to begin taking steps to improve the situation.
The Roman Philosopher Sallust said, “Every man is the architect of his own fortune.”
Have you actually looked for another job? Have you tried to improve your skills through in-house training, adult learning centers, books or correspondence courses? Even the smallest step in the right direction is progress. An obstinate boss won’t change his ways, but you can improve your own skills. Why not let your difficult boss be the motivation you use to better yourself?
5 Great Tips to Handle Stress
Stress has always been a part of our lives. In this hectic time, people lead an increasingly stressful life. Experts state that a little stress can be good; it keeps you sharp and ready to move forward, and is sometimes vital for achieving optimum performance. However, medical research has determined that prolonged stress is very bad for the body, and can block the body's natural ability to repair, regenerate and protect itself. Over 90% of disease is caused by stress. Stress is both a physical and psychological response. It can lead to chronic disease, obesity, insomnia, deteriorating relationships, depression, and more.
Stress is such a powerful and harmful force that it is vital that you learn effective stress management techniques to live a successful, happy, and healthy life. We must remember that we will always come across inevitable factors that cause pressure and anxiety on us. What we do not know is that it is not really the problems that are difficult to deal with, but our attitude towards them. So basically, the cause of stress is your attitude toward these things. What, then, is an effective way to deal with stressors?
Below are 5 great tips to handle stress.
1. Identify what makes you stressful and uneasy. Making a list of your stressful experiences is useful. Immediately deal with the issues that you can change, for instance waking up earlier for work in the morning, not leaving things till the last minute, and delegating tasks in case you are taking responsibility for everything. Forget about the issues that you cannot influence like being stuck in a traffic jam or not getting into the elevator because there is no room for you.
2. Calm down. A few minutes break would do you good. Wash your face, breath slowly and deeply, and notice if there is tension in any part of your body and release it. You can also listen to relaxing music, or call a friend. Releasing your inner feelings to a friend is healthy option.
3. It will pass and it will be over before you know it. Remind yourself that the stressful event will end sooner or later can make you see the positive sides of things. At the same time, calm down your emotions and think of what is the best thing to do rather than take your energy away from what needs to be done.
4. Know yourself. Ask yourself: What triggers your anxiety? If for example it is your job, then maybe it’s time for you to reconsider whether it would be best to find a less stressful job. You can also make your job more tolerable by allowing yourself to get that needed vacation or leave.
5. Learn to use your relaxation response. Just as we all have within us the stress response, we also have an opposite response, which is the relaxation response. A person should elicit that on a regular basis. The relaxation response involves two steps. Repetition, the repetition can be a word, a sound, an expression, or a repetitive movement. The second step is to ignore other thoughts that come to your mind while you're doing the repetition, and come back to the repetition. The technique should be used once or twice a day for about 15 minutes. Sit quietly and choose a suitable repetition, like a prayer, the sound Om, or the word love, or calm. Or you can do a repetitive exercise, for instance yoga, jogging, Reiki. Additional repetitive activities are knitting or handicraft. When you incorporate this into your everyday life, you become calmer and better able to handle the stressors. Practice makes perfect and the more you practice relax your mind, the easier it gets.
The true causes of stress are not the problems or negative experiences that you encounter in your life; but your attitude toward them. So, the trick is to change your attitude and to develop a relaxed state, because you cannot be stressed and relaxed at the same time. It is important to understand that what we focus on, we energize. The more you continue to think about the factors that cause your stress, the more energy you give it. So it is vital to let go and focus on relaxation instead. Consequently, you're less likely to be upset by a stressor, and thus less likely to have its harmful effect occur. Eventually, it is your choice. You could either continue to react in the same stressful way, or you could choose to improve your life by changing your attitude and becoming relaxed. There’s no other way around it.
Stress is such a powerful and harmful force that it is vital that you learn effective stress management techniques to live a successful, happy, and healthy life. We must remember that we will always come across inevitable factors that cause pressure and anxiety on us. What we do not know is that it is not really the problems that are difficult to deal with, but our attitude towards them. So basically, the cause of stress is your attitude toward these things. What, then, is an effective way to deal with stressors?
Below are 5 great tips to handle stress.
1. Identify what makes you stressful and uneasy. Making a list of your stressful experiences is useful. Immediately deal with the issues that you can change, for instance waking up earlier for work in the morning, not leaving things till the last minute, and delegating tasks in case you are taking responsibility for everything. Forget about the issues that you cannot influence like being stuck in a traffic jam or not getting into the elevator because there is no room for you.
2. Calm down. A few minutes break would do you good. Wash your face, breath slowly and deeply, and notice if there is tension in any part of your body and release it. You can also listen to relaxing music, or call a friend. Releasing your inner feelings to a friend is healthy option.
3. It will pass and it will be over before you know it. Remind yourself that the stressful event will end sooner or later can make you see the positive sides of things. At the same time, calm down your emotions and think of what is the best thing to do rather than take your energy away from what needs to be done.
4. Know yourself. Ask yourself: What triggers your anxiety? If for example it is your job, then maybe it’s time for you to reconsider whether it would be best to find a less stressful job. You can also make your job more tolerable by allowing yourself to get that needed vacation or leave.
5. Learn to use your relaxation response. Just as we all have within us the stress response, we also have an opposite response, which is the relaxation response. A person should elicit that on a regular basis. The relaxation response involves two steps. Repetition, the repetition can be a word, a sound, an expression, or a repetitive movement. The second step is to ignore other thoughts that come to your mind while you're doing the repetition, and come back to the repetition. The technique should be used once or twice a day for about 15 minutes. Sit quietly and choose a suitable repetition, like a prayer, the sound Om, or the word love, or calm. Or you can do a repetitive exercise, for instance yoga, jogging, Reiki. Additional repetitive activities are knitting or handicraft. When you incorporate this into your everyday life, you become calmer and better able to handle the stressors. Practice makes perfect and the more you practice relax your mind, the easier it gets.
The true causes of stress are not the problems or negative experiences that you encounter in your life; but your attitude toward them. So, the trick is to change your attitude and to develop a relaxed state, because you cannot be stressed and relaxed at the same time. It is important to understand that what we focus on, we energize. The more you continue to think about the factors that cause your stress, the more energy you give it. So it is vital to let go and focus on relaxation instead. Consequently, you're less likely to be upset by a stressor, and thus less likely to have its harmful effect occur. Eventually, it is your choice. You could either continue to react in the same stressful way, or you could choose to improve your life by changing your attitude and becoming relaxed. There’s no other way around it.
Tuesday, December 15, 2009
9 Secrets For Stress-Free Living
1) Accept the problem
You have to be at peace with a problem, WHILST it is in existence, for the solution to come to you. i.e. you have to accept yourself where you are, no matter what - you cannot solve any problem without first accepting it, and yourself. We spend so much of our time trying to deny what has happened or deny a part of ourselves, pushing it away, which only leads to more of the problem appearing in your life. Very often simply fully accepting the part of you that is creating the problem will be enough to have it disappear, as it is so used to being pushed away/rejected. Part of you is trying to send you a message; maybe it’s time you listened.
2) You cannot attract to you, that to which you are not already connected
So be an appreciator. One of the fastest ways to attract what you want towards you is learning to appreciate the good in whatever situation it is life is presenting you with. Being an appreciator is so important because it is the closest energetic vibrational match to source and therefore the creation of what it is that you want. Therefore the more you operate at that frequency, the closer to source you are, and the faster things will manifest for you in the physical world. It is not important to verbalize your appreciation but simply to offer it. Appreciation is the antidote to some of the lowest forms of energy and emotions we are capable of e.g. shame, resentment, etc. By offering thanks and assuming that you already have what you seek, you immediately begin to attract more of it towards you, whether you have any of it or not.
3) Happiness is not pleasure
The experience of pleasure is a right now, in-the-moment, sensory-rich, and sights, sounds, and feelings experience in your person. Happiness is your meta-experience when thinking about something that brings you such pleasure. Happiness cannot be experienced by the senses directly, only pleasure can. Focus your life on having more now-moment pleasure experiences, rather than accumulating reasons or things to be happy about.
4) Stay connected to source
Find your own personal way to stay connected to your higher consciousness (the feeling you). For many this is meditation, music, song, etc. Why are we so attracted to parks? water? nature? wildlife and animals? We have awareness on some level that we are part of a much greater collected consciousness, something else, something higher than us. Some people may be partially disconnected from it, but you can never fully disconnect from it. Notice that the word emotion is e + motion. Notice that the concepts are so connected even on a linguistic level. Did you know that elephants are one of the very few creatures other than humans who cry tears of emotion? And when was the last time you saw an elephant running? They have adapted or have been given an ability to release emotions from tears in the same way humans do. People are attracted to source because we recognize that’s where we want to be, we want to have those feelings, we want to experience that energy, because the energy, just by being in its presence, makes us feel better about ourselves.
5) Live in the moment
We only have access to our full personal power in the present moment. This is practicing the art; it’s a habit to be developed, a life-skill. The extent, to which you are connecting, on some unconscious level, either into the past or into the future, is the extent to which you rob yourself of your present power. You are not going to be experiencing what it is that you want; therefore you are moving your emotional point of attraction, into negative territory. Being in the present moment is the only way you can make an emotional connection to what it is that you want, and therefore begin the process of it becoming attracted to you in future present moments. This type of emotional alignment cannot be achieved when your thoughts are in the future or past. “But how much do I need to be in the present moment? I have all this stuff to do…..” You must be in the present moment enough to have enough fully-loaded, pleasurable, positive full body feelings, about what you want to attract in your life, in order to begin the process of its automatic attraction to you. Living with your thoughts at a future or past moment in time, is entirely redundant in the process of being free of stress, and attracting what you want into your life.
6) You can never be enough to
You can never be sorry enough to change this problem situation. It is only when you love yourself that you have that love to radiate to others. It is only when you are allowing the abundance to flow to you, that you then have the ability to gift it to others. Giving your energy – in any form – to others, whether it is love, forgiveness, agreement, or any energy, when your cup is not already brimming over, is the fastest route to the emotional poorhouse. If you want to help others, you must first help yourself. Others easily see through empty gestures, compliments, or favors; and, such gestures only hide you from your own emotional impoverishment/malnutrition. They are not useful, and serve no purpose in enhancing your life or others’.
7) Be selfish enough to line up with your intentions
This is important because it is only in your thriving that you have anything to offer others. If your own energy tank is not full, you have no business looking after the tanks of others. It is important to limit your own responsibilities to prevent emotions like lack of self-worth etc. Remain present and in attendance to your own needs first and you will always give others your best, automatically.
8) You are not your accomplishments
Understand that you are not your accomplishments, what you do, what you don’t do, your beliefs, your ideas, your stuff or possessions, those are nothing to do with who you really are, they are the baggage you have picked up along the way, they are nothing to do with the spiritual you who wants to feel good; and stay connected to Peace. Lose your ego, and take this attitude of freedom with you in your everyday life.
9) The journey is the destination
Many times our internal dialogue says “If only I had x, then I would be happy, or, “I’ll be happy when I’ve got…” As you go into the world and experience the contrast of your likes .vs. your dislikes, through your everyday experiences, so a new want is born. Then comes the striving (and usually struggle) in the journey towards its manifestation, which contains all the stresses and strains you wish to rid yourself of. Understand this: you’ll never get it done. Because the journey itself towards your wants shows you new elements of contrast, new possibilities, new likes and dislikes, etc that change and alter your path. Thus your job here is not to get caught up in the end result but to ensure you enjoy the journey along the way, regardless of your goal, and ensure that your everyday journey contains all the same underlying experiences, emotions, and full-body feelings that you seek from your end goal, anyway. The journey is the destination. So enjoy it.
Bringing it all together
So how do we overcome the various stress blocks to pull greater peace and abundance towards us? EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) is one way to release the emotional blocks of shoulds, musts, ought-tos, anger, fear, resentment, and so on. Once the biggest unconscious blocks have been resolved, your intentions, ambitions, passion will feel that much free-er to move towards you, automatically and effortlessly. Circumstances and people appear in your life from nowhere and events begin aligning themselves, as the universe conspires with you, to realize your passion.
You have to be at peace with a problem, WHILST it is in existence, for the solution to come to you. i.e. you have to accept yourself where you are, no matter what - you cannot solve any problem without first accepting it, and yourself. We spend so much of our time trying to deny what has happened or deny a part of ourselves, pushing it away, which only leads to more of the problem appearing in your life. Very often simply fully accepting the part of you that is creating the problem will be enough to have it disappear, as it is so used to being pushed away/rejected. Part of you is trying to send you a message; maybe it’s time you listened.
2) You cannot attract to you, that to which you are not already connected
So be an appreciator. One of the fastest ways to attract what you want towards you is learning to appreciate the good in whatever situation it is life is presenting you with. Being an appreciator is so important because it is the closest energetic vibrational match to source and therefore the creation of what it is that you want. Therefore the more you operate at that frequency, the closer to source you are, and the faster things will manifest for you in the physical world. It is not important to verbalize your appreciation but simply to offer it. Appreciation is the antidote to some of the lowest forms of energy and emotions we are capable of e.g. shame, resentment, etc. By offering thanks and assuming that you already have what you seek, you immediately begin to attract more of it towards you, whether you have any of it or not.
3) Happiness is not pleasure
The experience of pleasure is a right now, in-the-moment, sensory-rich, and sights, sounds, and feelings experience in your person. Happiness is your meta-experience when thinking about something that brings you such pleasure. Happiness cannot be experienced by the senses directly, only pleasure can. Focus your life on having more now-moment pleasure experiences, rather than accumulating reasons or things to be happy about.
4) Stay connected to source
Find your own personal way to stay connected to your higher consciousness (the feeling you). For many this is meditation, music, song, etc. Why are we so attracted to parks? water? nature? wildlife and animals? We have awareness on some level that we are part of a much greater collected consciousness, something else, something higher than us. Some people may be partially disconnected from it, but you can never fully disconnect from it. Notice that the word emotion is e + motion. Notice that the concepts are so connected even on a linguistic level. Did you know that elephants are one of the very few creatures other than humans who cry tears of emotion? And when was the last time you saw an elephant running? They have adapted or have been given an ability to release emotions from tears in the same way humans do. People are attracted to source because we recognize that’s where we want to be, we want to have those feelings, we want to experience that energy, because the energy, just by being in its presence, makes us feel better about ourselves.
5) Live in the moment
We only have access to our full personal power in the present moment. This is practicing the art; it’s a habit to be developed, a life-skill. The extent, to which you are connecting, on some unconscious level, either into the past or into the future, is the extent to which you rob yourself of your present power. You are not going to be experiencing what it is that you want; therefore you are moving your emotional point of attraction, into negative territory. Being in the present moment is the only way you can make an emotional connection to what it is that you want, and therefore begin the process of it becoming attracted to you in future present moments. This type of emotional alignment cannot be achieved when your thoughts are in the future or past. “But how much do I need to be in the present moment? I have all this stuff to do…..” You must be in the present moment enough to have enough fully-loaded, pleasurable, positive full body feelings, about what you want to attract in your life, in order to begin the process of its automatic attraction to you. Living with your thoughts at a future or past moment in time, is entirely redundant in the process of being free of stress, and attracting what you want into your life.
6) You can never be enough to
You can never be sorry enough to change this problem situation. It is only when you love yourself that you have that love to radiate to others. It is only when you are allowing the abundance to flow to you, that you then have the ability to gift it to others. Giving your energy – in any form – to others, whether it is love, forgiveness, agreement, or any energy, when your cup is not already brimming over, is the fastest route to the emotional poorhouse. If you want to help others, you must first help yourself. Others easily see through empty gestures, compliments, or favors; and, such gestures only hide you from your own emotional impoverishment/malnutrition. They are not useful, and serve no purpose in enhancing your life or others’.
7) Be selfish enough to line up with your intentions
This is important because it is only in your thriving that you have anything to offer others. If your own energy tank is not full, you have no business looking after the tanks of others. It is important to limit your own responsibilities to prevent emotions like lack of self-worth etc. Remain present and in attendance to your own needs first and you will always give others your best, automatically.
8) You are not your accomplishments
Understand that you are not your accomplishments, what you do, what you don’t do, your beliefs, your ideas, your stuff or possessions, those are nothing to do with who you really are, they are the baggage you have picked up along the way, they are nothing to do with the spiritual you who wants to feel good; and stay connected to Peace. Lose your ego, and take this attitude of freedom with you in your everyday life.
9) The journey is the destination
Many times our internal dialogue says “If only I had x, then I would be happy, or, “I’ll be happy when I’ve got…” As you go into the world and experience the contrast of your likes .vs. your dislikes, through your everyday experiences, so a new want is born. Then comes the striving (and usually struggle) in the journey towards its manifestation, which contains all the stresses and strains you wish to rid yourself of. Understand this: you’ll never get it done. Because the journey itself towards your wants shows you new elements of contrast, new possibilities, new likes and dislikes, etc that change and alter your path. Thus your job here is not to get caught up in the end result but to ensure you enjoy the journey along the way, regardless of your goal, and ensure that your everyday journey contains all the same underlying experiences, emotions, and full-body feelings that you seek from your end goal, anyway. The journey is the destination. So enjoy it.
Bringing it all together
So how do we overcome the various stress blocks to pull greater peace and abundance towards us? EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) is one way to release the emotional blocks of shoulds, musts, ought-tos, anger, fear, resentment, and so on. Once the biggest unconscious blocks have been resolved, your intentions, ambitions, passion will feel that much free-er to move towards you, automatically and effortlessly. Circumstances and people appear in your life from nowhere and events begin aligning themselves, as the universe conspires with you, to realize your passion.
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